Communication

Adam is 22 years old. My first born son and a communicator by nature; he and I have been having some very interesting and thought provoking discussions about the upcoming election. It's not his first time to vote but it is the first time he has been so passionate about candidates and issues. His opinions are interesting to me as they are well informed and also because they are his. I'm not sure why my opinions are of interest to him but they are and I'm glad.

I find myself wondering how we came to this delightful turn of events. For one thing, he was always communicative. He got that from his father who was never one to simply reply "fine" to my questions regarding his day. But communicative children can be silenced by the indifference of the adults in their lives.

It occurs to me that we have always talked and while the discussion now are stimulating they haven't always been. There was a time when we spoke of Pokemon and video games. I distinctly remember a discussion about who had greater powers - Superman or Batman - and the fairness of that discussion since Superman was really an alien. It was during these times my young son learned that I cared about what he had to say. His opinion mattered. It wasn't always easy. Often there was real work to be done...dinner to cook, bathrooms to clean or other chores waiting. And, after all, who really cares about the fate of Cid? Except my son did and therefore, so did I. If Final Fantasy is what he wanted to talk about (and we DID talk about it) then I was up to the challenge.

So, the next time your little one wants to talk about Barbie, Sponge Bob, Dora or Spider Man cop a squat and enjoy. Look to the future when they are grown and conversations with you are their choice. The listening you do now will help them know that you care about what they think and that will keep them coming back for more.

Kathy