What is the job of a parent? If there were a job description, which there isn't, it would be too complex to follow. Parents must be many things but nowhere does it say that I should be my kids friend. It also doesn't say that I should strive to make them happy all the time and especially happy with me. In fact, sometimes it is precisely the job of a parent to say and do things that may make our children upset with us.
I have a friend whose daughter wants a Facebook page and he is opposed. You may be asking yourself what is wrong with that because your child has a Facebook page (doesn't everyone?) but he is opposed because his child is not yet the approved age by Facebook. Facebook says that you can't have a page until you are 13 and this dad believes that following the rules is important. He's trying to set the right example and teach his daughter that rules need to be followed. She, as you might expect, is throwing all of the typical pre-teen/teen cliches at him. "All of my friends have one"...."no one follows those stupid rules"....."you're ruining my social life"...etc. If you are a parent I'm sure you can imagine what life must be like for my friend.
So, what's a dad to do? I've encouraged him to stand firm. If following the rules is one of your values (and it should be) then stick with it. Children really do want boundaries. They want parents to care enough to make rules. They may bitterly complain but they still want to know that you fight for their best welfare.
Some of my favorite parenting advice goes like this: "BE THE PARENT!" That is precisely what he's doing.
Kathy
1 comment:
Sound advice for validating a parent's dilemma. Your Rock!
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