Friday, September 28, 2012

Which is Your Favorite Child?

There was a debate earlier in the week on The Today Show (something I watch every morning) about a blogger that wrote about having a favorite child.  His supposition was that no matter what parents said they really did have a favorite.  Now, I wish I was sitting in front of every person reading this because I would love to know what your initial response is to that statement.  I think that nearly everyone would have the politically correct words coming out of their mouth ("oh no, that's not true!" or "of course, I love all of them equally!") but I would be able to tell by the look on your face whether or not you really believed what you were saying.  I'm pretty intuitive. 

So, which is it?  Do you have a favorite?  Are you willing to admit it and name the child you favor?  Is that guy full of it and, of course, no one has a favorite?  I think the answer is slightly more complex than that.

Human relationships are complex.  A parent's love is probably the strongest love there is among humans.  People naturally feel drawn to or repelled by others and I think parents are the same....I mean, they are people too, right?

So, who is your favorite?  Well, if it helps any I'll reveal my favorite.....

Adam is my favorite because he is my firstborn.  We tried for many years to have a baby and were beyond thrilled when we became pregnant.  I rejoiced every time I threw up with morning sickness....no kidding.  He was a wonder and miracle and perfect all wrapped up in one chubby little boy.  As he grew he was fun and sweet and loved to share his life with us.  He filled our house with beautiful music and currently advocates for refugees.  We are beyond proud of him.  Absolutely my favorite.

Ryan is my favorite because we had two miscarriages before we got pregnant with him.  We worked hard for that baby and had some heartbreak along the way.  He was a sweet baby with an infectious belly laugh that echoed throughout our home.  He has grown up to be a smart, logical, loving man that fills us with pride in the man that he is becoming.  His passion for helping the students he teaches is amazing.  Yep, definitely my favorite.

Taylor is my favorite because he gives the BEST bear hugs.....bar none.  I defy anyone to show me someone who does it better.  He is without a doubt the most mellow and laid back person I have ever had the pleasure to know.  He has been that way since birth and I marvel that he came from my womb.  His comfort level with himself is astounding.  He is artsy, creative, and courageous.  He never gives up.  He is quite obviously my favorite.

Leah is my favorite because she is the only girl.  She shops with me, gets mani/pedis with me and is really my clone.  She is so much like me I sometimes feel like we are one person in two bodies.  She is my friend and sweet girl.  We never even had that classic mother/daughter conflict when she was a teenager.  I enjoy her enthusiasm for life and her care and concern for others.  How can she NOT be my favorite?  Totally, my favorite.   

Okay, so I cheated but let's be honest.  As great as they all are, haven't they all gotten on my nerves at one point and I considered sending them back to the hospital?  Oh, heck, yeah!  (unfortunately there are no returns during the teen years)  No relationship is without it's bumps.  Everyone brings something different to the table and even if I don't get or like it, they bring it.  It's important to value all of them for what and who they are.  It's the whole of the picture that is the important thing.  It's what we all are together.  That is my favorite. 

One last thing......my REAL favorite is their dad.  Please don't tell my kids I said that. 

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